"It Gets Better" as we "Love One Another:" The Single Story of Gay and Lesbian Mormons

Gay men and women are portrayed in the media as:

Protestors who fight for equal rights and feel they should be treated as heterosexual couples are.

Ellen Degeneres and Portia de Rossi Wedding -- given lots of attention in the media when it occurred in 2008.

Two men; one playing the "motherly" role and one the more "manly." (Mitch and Cam from Modern Family)

However, I decided to look closer at how gay Mormons portray themselves because I feel like this is a minority group that does not get proper recognition. Here's some of what I found:

"It Gets Better at BYU" - A Message from LGBT students at Brigham Young University

www.farbetweenmovie.com - This website is full of interviews with gay and lesbian Mormons and their family and friends.

www.mormonsandgays.com - This website focuses on the Church's standpoint on same-sex attraction.

There were two prevalent messages I gathered as I analyzed these artifacts about Mormons who suffer with same-sex attraction. The first was that these feelings are not a choice, and the second was a message of love; love from God toward gays and a plea for love from Church members toward the gay Mormon community. These messages are crucial for members of the Church to receive. There is a common misconception that being gay is a choice and that could not be further from the truth. As I watched the interviews and read the articles regarding the gay Mormon community, I could hear the sincerity in the interviewees voices, pleading with members of the Church to accept them as they are and sending the message that, if we all focused on loving one another, judgment would not be such a problem among Church members, gay and straight alike.

I do not believe that these messages are limiting because they are messages generalized to be addressed to the whole Church and anyone else who is willing to listen. Society, in general, is not very well-versed on this topic so addressing a very general audience is the least limiting way to express this message. I do believe, however, that this group is one that is under-represented in society -- it's hard for others to understand that the Mormon faith accepts people no matter their sexuality, but that's what these videos and articles are all about.

Being gay is not a choice; it is a challenge one is born with. As we remember this and heed the instructions of the Savior to “love one another,” the gay Mormon community will feel loved and accepted by other members of the Church and, therefore, feel more at peace as they remember their true identity as a son or daughter of God.